How Healthy Boundaries Build Trust in the Workplace

“When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated” – Brene Brown.

Over the last two years, organisations and their employees have had no choice but to be flexible—moving in a myriad of directions, navigating the unknown territory of hybrid and remote work and the constant change of those events.

The pandemic has caused stress and overwhelm for many, if not all, workplaces. It has also taken a toll on how we work and communicate, resulting in feelings of resentment, uncertainty and a loss of trust and connection.

One of the most common issues I have seen is the issue of micromanagement. In some cases, managers unconsciously feel a lack of control when employees work from home, resulting in micro-managing behaviours. These can cause serious issues in an organisation, sending messages of mistrust from both manager and employee, resulting in decreased performance and engagement.

Why boundaries matter

Boundaries are limits that a person creates for themselves. They guide the people around them to behave in psychologically safe and appropriate ways. When we create and communicate our boundaries, we respect ourselves and ask others for respect.

When others respect our boundaries, trust is built. Therefore, it’s essential for healthy working relationships.

However, it is very common for people to shy away from saying no to something or asserting a boundary. This is due to being concerned about being perceived as selfish or not a team player.

It all starts and stops with the leaders of an organisation. They must first lead by example and respect the boundaries of team members. Training should be provided for all on how to deal with situations where boundaries are breached, and a psychologically safe space must be cultivated, so employees feel empowered to communicate when this happens.

Three tips on how to set boundaries  

1. Define your boundaries

We all have different values, expectations and life experiences, so everyone’s boundaries will differ. Include prompts to encourage self-reflection to identify boundaries.

2. Share them with the people around you

The people in your personal life will know you infinitely better than your coworkers. Having your coworker email you five times a day or ask you personal questions about yourself will start causing resentment to build up. Support your teams to share their boundaries, so they can be aware and mindful of what each other finds acceptable or not.

3. Allow flexibility in some situations

Getting an email from your manager at 11 pm may seem to be crossing the line of what is reasonable, but it is always a good idea to be flexible when the circumstances call for it. For example, if they have asked for some vital information for an early morning meeting the next day, crossing the line may be acceptable. However, when it is to send some information “urgently” for no given reason, this is perhaps where the line is crossed. How you navigate this issue depends on your situation and the type of boundary being crossed.

Avoid unnecessary conflict and miscommunication

Setting boundaries and being clear on your expectations for your team will build trust and create stronger working relationships based on respect. If and when a boundary is breached, it’s important for everyone to feel equipped to deal with it.

One way to do this is to provide communication training. Workshops like these can help employees tackle difficult conversations and extinguish, identify and manage potential conflicts before they become disputes. They encourage communication and transparency and enhance your work environment—creating a better culture for all.

 

Saranne Segal is the Director of Segal Conflict Solutionsin Sydney Australia. She is a workplace mediation and investigation expert and has worked as a lawyer previously.